So the other day I was looking up manifestation stories online and I suddenly realised, ‘My god, I actually manifested Tyler without consciously meaning to!!’..
As manifesting is something that’s kind of still new to me, I thought I would share with you guys a little story.
Rewind back to 2014, boy was I lonely.
I’ve kind of had the worst luck with partners in the past, I hadn’t even figured out myself yet(which was the problem), but was attracting the kind of people that needed to work on themselves, a LOT.
I was giving out these vibes like, ‘No one will ever love me, I’m a piece of shit, I have two kids already, they’ll just cheat on me or lie to me, I want someone to love me and then I will start to love myself, I will be happy when I find someone, I suck with guys I always attract ones that only care about themselves, I just want a family bla bla.’
Woah… can you imagine the kind of guys I was drawing in from thinking this^^!
One after the next, jerk, dick, asshole, liar.. blergh!
Mind you, I already had 2 kids, to two different people and that as a start, is not something that tends to draw in your ideal kind of partner. I had pretty much got to a point where I lost all hope of ever having a big, loving family where we lived happily ever after, cliché right?
I gave up. And THAT was where things started to change. My mind set went from “needing a guy” to, not needing anyone. I was a strong, independent woman, who was absolutely set on making a future for the kids and myself.. by myself.
So there I was, working through a tonne of past emotions and screw ups, trying to get qualified to get a job to make money. I had settled with, okay, so maybe we will have to rent forever, but as long as the kids have food, clothes on their back and a roof over their head then we will be just fine!
I was only single for about 2 years after my last big split with the ex-fiancé.. and I got some pretty rotten people say some horrible things.. “I want my own family.. I couldn’t handle two kids.. I don’t want to be a dad yet..” So on.
Whatever, it annoyed me at first because, well, I never asked you to be a dad, I just wanted to be loved. But then my thoughts started to change.
No! I started to internally stick up for myself as I’d had enough.
You know what, I don’t WANT someone who doesn’t want me because of the kids- my kids are EVERYTHING to me, I wont settle for anything less than someone who TREATS me like I fricken deserve to be treated! Like a Queen!
I had come to the realisation that no matter what I’d been through, and no matter my life circumstances, that I was a good, down to earth, HONEST, loving person, and anyone should be so lucky to be with me- AND have 2 wonderful little kiddies running around to love as well. I’d always known this, I just got a little side tracked and lost along the way.
From then on it didn’t matter to me, I didn’t want to look for a relationship, I had decided that the right guy would come to me, “when I stop looking”.. as we always hear.
That was only the beginning of it all.
The manifestation began right after this, when I started thinking about it …
What DO you want in a man anyway?
I began to conjure lists of the “perfect” guy, and NO I don’t mean a ken doll. Of course noone’s going to be perfect. But in time I thought, if this perfect guy walked into my life right now, would I be ready to accept him? Would I feel worthy? What traits would he have that would make him an ideal husband or ‘keeper’.
This list became pretty simple for me, and I started to put it out there to the universe. I would tell my friends, I would think it whenever I felt lonely.
- A man who loves me unconditionally, who accepts me with all my ‘flaws’
- A man who loves my children as much as I do, and accepts them as his own without resent.
- A man who strives to achieve success and constantly wants to improve in all areas of his life.
- A man who is honest, who respects himself, me and others, and who can communicate openly with me.
- A man who would do anything for his family, a man who provides.
- A man who tells me he loves me, and that I am beautiful every single day.
- A man who makes me feel safe, secure and supported.
- And lets be honest, I did ask that he had a job & a car…. 😉
I wanted a man version of me, someone who upheld the same qualities and values.
Once I internally made this list, (I may have even written it somewhere) I began to manifest by attracting what I WANTED in a man, rather than what I didn’t want.
I didn’t get tempted into relationships with people my gut told me were wrong, and I said, no, I will not settle until I know in my gut that this person is genuine.. that this person is the right one for me. I was actually completely happy after I had made this list, because I KNEW that somehow, sooner or later, he would arrive in my life.
I didn’t know how or who it would be, but I knew I would know.. make sense?
Low and behold.. a few months later at a friends house, she was throwing a party. I remember watching her in one of her “let’s hook you up” moments as she searched through her phone to show me a few of the people that were coming to the party.
She began to talk about the first one, I rolled my eyes continuously.. nah I don’t really care, if it’s meant to happen it will happen.
“Wait, OMG! I have the perfect guy for you, why didn’t I think of him before.. he’s a bit younger than you but he’s the nicest guy and he loves kids and I think he knows who you are!”
I rolled my eyes. Ugh how embarrassing. She showed me pictures and we giggled, next minute I had a text message on my phone from this guy….?!
“Umm Larissa, why is this guy messaging me?!?!”
Turns out she had sent him my number and insisted that he message me. Now I didn’t know what to think. Surely the “perfect guy” couldn’t be one that I randomly get set up with over facebook… We chatted… pretty much non stop for the next few days .. He seemed very interested … And my friend was very pleased with her match making work, still to the day she says “I knew it!”.
We met a few days later and went on our first and last “date”… no we didn’t kiss.. there was vibes being thrown left, right and centre.. I had anxiety like.. no way this guy could be “the one..” could he? And yet he still messaged me as soon as I left.
Now, he did have a job, but no car …. hahaha well it’s a start I thought. After getting to know him he seemed to start ticking off all those things on my list..
I honestly don’t know what it was about me that attracted him, but I held my ground. I told him what I wanted, yes.. I want a relationship, I’m done looking around, so don’t waste your time if this means nothing to you.
“When can I see you again…?”
“Uhh.. you actually want to see me again? I have kids remember”..
He met them.. and (Gah now I’m tearing up), literally from the FIRST day he met them he has treated them nothing less than as if they were his own. From day one!!
He moved in a week later to help out with rent (talk about moving fast!)
What can I say, but when you know you know?! When you ask, you will receive!
My dream man.. is still here nearly 3 years later.. and he still upholds each of the characteristics I prayed for.. he STILL tells me he loves me, showers me with kisses and hugs everyday (and that was my fault, because sometimes its TOO MUCH LOVE!! Haha!!). We talk about the future everyday, we talk about having another child, getting married, our future house, and encourage each other to reach our maximum potential each and every day. Now I don’t know what the future holds.. but maybe I will give that wedding manifestation a go 😉
Ladies, it’s simple. You hear, “he will come along when the timing is right”.. and it’s 100% true. So we need to make sure that we are open, and ready to accept love that we deserve, we need to know that we deserve the absolute best- we get back what signals we are putting out.
So if you’re looking for your dream man, but aren’t so much in love with yourself enough to KNOW that you deserve the BEST… maybe take a little time to work on you.
But if you’re ready for him, and you know you deserve him, I want you to write a list.
List all the characteristics, values and traits you WANT in a man, without worrying about what he looks like and start talking about it. Tell people you will not settle until you get someone who treats you like a QUEEN. (Of course you’ll have to be prepared to treat him like the King he is!!). Talk about it, think about it, feel it in your body, “he is on his way”.
You’ll probably get blindsided, he may be the last person you expected, but he will get to you when you are ready, and when the universe aligns.
Go with your GUT. Ask and you shall receive. Be patient, focus on yourself and what you want.
P.s Love you babe xxx